Ravenous

The house next door to my house burned down today. It happened pretty early, around 7 in the morning; firetrucks blocked my driveway until about 10:30. As a result of the barricade, I couldn't go to work until around 11... which was just enough time to watch one of the coolest movies I've seen in recent memory.

The dark-comedy, cannibalistic horror-thriller I'm referring to is Ravenous, a 1999 Antonia Bird flick starring Guy Pearce (The Kings Speech, The Count of Monte Cristo). Opposite Pearce is an awesome cast, led by the always great Robert Carlyle (28 Weeks Later, The Full Monty). Fun Fact: Carlyle played the role of Hitler in a 2003 tv movie; his role in Ravenous was just as demented.

Get ready for spoilers, even though I highly suggest going out and watching this bitch as soon as possible- it fucking rules.

The flick starts off with a bit of murky back-story. It's the 1840s and Captain John Boyd (Pearce) is being recognized for courage in the line of duty (similar to the Call of Duty: Black Ops). He went behind enemy lines and killed a shit load of Mexicans during his stint with the Army in the Mexican-American war. In actuality, he choked up and wasn't very courageous at all; he simply played dead while his men were being cut down around him and then killed his enemies after they brought the dead back to their fort (why they brought the dead back to their hide-out is unclear... and totally fucking stupid).

His commanding officers realize how much of a coward he is and, instead of demoting him (which would have looked bad due to his recent rank award), Boyd is sent to Fort Spencer in the remote Sierra Nevada mountains.

Once in exile, or at least the closest thing to it, Boyd meets the rag-tag skeleton crew manning the fort. Colonel Hart (Jeffery Jones) is the commanding officer, with Knox (Stephen Spinella) the alcoholic second in command. Along for the ride is the always high (he loves the peace pipe) Private Cleaves (David Arquette), Private Toffler (Jeremy Davies, aka Daniel Faraday from LOST), Private Reich (Neal McDonough) and an couple of Indians because why the fuck not, right?

So Boyd is kind of pissed and still confused about his earlier awards ceremony and even more confused about what led to his sudden courageousness at the enemy fort. After he played dead, he was thrown into a heap along with his dead comrades- as a result, he was covered in his fellow patriots' blood, some of which inevitably went down his throat. It was this unexpected and accidental consumption of blood that rejuvenated Boyd and led to his rampage.

He doesn't have much time at the fort to think ponder this discovery, as late one night a half dead guy stumbles into his camp. After saving the mans life, the stranger, who reveals himself to be an F.W. Colhoun, tells his tale. He was part of a west bound party that hit rough times. The group started off fine, but bad weather forced them into a cave. There, they quickly ran out of food and had to turn on their oxen and horses for sustenance- the eventually turned on each other. Colhoun barely escaped from the lead cannibal in the group, Colonel Ives. Ives killed four people total before Colhoun was able to escape.

As you can imagine, the group at Fort Spencer are collectively shocked by this mans claims and immediately set out to investigate. It's right around here where the story gets predictable. Colhoun leads them to the cave, where Reich and Boyd go in to investigate. While they're inside, Colhoun picks the rest of the men off one by one- the entire story was a trap and it's Colhoun who is actually the crazed cannibal killer.

After a crazy fight scene in the woods where everyone but Boyd dies (he only lives because he eats most of a very dead Reich), Boyd returns to camp to tell his tale. General Slauson is in charge now, taking over for Hart. When Boyd tells his story, no one really believes him, especially after Colhoun, now being refereed to by his real name Colonel Ives. Boyd flips a shit when he sees him and this only makes him look even more insane.

Ives starts fucking with Boyd immediately, playing dumb when Boyd accuses him around others, but revealing that he is actually a cannibal when they're alone. It all comes to a head when Ives tells Boyd about how the consumption of human flesh and blood causes the canibal to grow stronger and more healthy, kind of like getting 100 coins or a mushroom in Super Mario.

I'm going to fast forward to a bunch more crazy shit including a drunken chess game, a stew being made out of people meat, murdered horses, a murdered Arquette and a whole lot of facial hair.

There's a great shot near the end of the movie, when Boyd and Col. Hart are talking about cannibalism. Hart is arguing that all Boyd has to do is kill, "Kill to live," he yells right before stabbing a dagger into a table. The next shot is from behind the table, with the dagger dividing the screen, with Hart on one side and Boyd on the other. This is an awesome shot and drives home the point that Hart is on one side (cannibalism) and Boyd is on the other (the side of not being fucking crazy)- good vs evil, if you will.

A pretty epic final battle between Ives and Boyd ends the movie, with each stabbing/beating/maiming/bear-trapping ("That was really sneaky") each other a shit ton of times- maybe not that realistic but definitely awesome. I won't say who wins- consider this a cliff hanger until you go and watch the movie.

One of the only issues I had with this movie, the only one I can really think of besides a few rough cuts in the action sequences, was the soundtrack. In some scenes, it was great- it set the mood perfectly with a blend of tribal tunes and suspense driven strings. But in other parts it was pretty distracting and it made me wonder just who the hell decided to put certain songs in these otherwise great scenes.

In the end, this was a terribly interesting and entertaining film that caught me totally off guard. I loved it and can't help but think that the guys behind the Red Dead Redemption video game were fans of this movie as well (especially the American Appetite mini-stories). Catch this movie the next time you get a chance, I guarantee it will leave you hungry for more.